before we left for the hospital. (i think i was having a contraction when this was being taken)
(this is long...)
once upon a time...at 6:30 am on August 3rd
we packed and left for Ogden Regional Medical Center
i was dilated to a 2 and 70% effaced
after checking in and getting all settled they started the pitocin at 8:30 am
i was worried about how ryan would do, if you know ryan you know he can't sit still and this was going to be awhile
thank goodness he can get sucked in to a tv show with the best of us...
i was also nervous about only eating ice chips...by noon i was STARVING i still get sad when i think how hungry i was
also around noon i started to feel a weird numbing sensation in the right side of my face
i told ryan i couldn't smile. when i heard my voice i realized i couldn't really talk either. i started to panic and cry and my contractions were starting to hurt worse.
our adorable nurse barbara was worried it was bells palsey (which made us panic more) ryan was good to not act paniced but later told me he thought i was having a stroke. barbara also scared us a little before this when we were talking about having a living will and she said she had only had 4 women die during child birth in 30 years as a nurse...really?? that seems high i would stick with none!
anyway...she called machel who came right over, she said my contractions were hurting me so bad (i have a REALLY low pain tolerance). my muscles were so tight because of the pain i was actually pinching nerves causing numbness. hello epidural! oh my goodness, a wise woman once told me not to see how long i could go without it and just to get it. oh i wish i would have listened to her from the get go (brilliant chelsie) the epidural was amazing. and now the fun really began...
i was dilated to 5 and 80-90% effaced and i stayed here f.o.r.e.v.e.r. they would kick up the pitocin and then turn it off. over and over again. nothing changed. except his little head had decided to turn so he was now transverse. after 10 episodes of the office we were feeling really discouraged. our families would text and call for updates and we really had none to give. machel came and checked me at 6 and we had finally dilated to a 6 and were now 100% effaced! i swear that felt like a huge milestone! the nurses started turning me every hour in hopes that our little guys head would turn...he evidentally did not get that memo!
as a side note i know it must be hard to work 12 hour shifts especially in the middle of the night, to leave your family, to be tired, etc. but seriously didn't you know that when you signed up to be a nurse?! and you are compensated rather nicely for your time!! we had a pretty lousy night nurse, she was so pessimistic, discouraging and negative! i had made it clear i wanted to do everything i could before we opted for a c-section, especially since neither i or nor the baby were in any danger, and i swear she was bound and determined for us to have a c-section. (i only have 7 weeks off of work and i didn't want to spend it all recovering, like i heard is likely with c-sections) at 10:30 she came in (while ryan was gone getting himself some treats) and tells me while i am ALONE that if by 11 i hadn't dilated any further i was going to have to have a c-section. as soon as she leaves i start to cry and pray and cry and pray. i tried to call ryan but i couldn't get ahold of him. i was so frustrated and tired. FINALLY ryan returned (about 2 min later). i told him the news, we prayed together and he asked all our family (and maybe friends...) to pray for us! my parents informed us they not only prayed we wouldn't have to have a c-section but also that the baby would hold out to be born on my dad's birthday, the 4th. gee thanks parents! around 11 in walks cranky nurse followed quickly by machel...it was like she knew the nurse was going to give up on us! i was slightly more dilated and they generously called me 7. machel said she knew i wouldn't have to have a c-section and we would just wait it out for awhile. also at about 11 i started getting feeling back in my legs. for anyone who has ever had an epidural you know this is VERY WRONG. i also started to feel my contractions a little more. not a lot but a little. they called in the anesthesiologist who changed the medication in hopes that would fix it. it didn't and we proceeded with a quickly fading epidural. my contractions really started hurting around midnight, i believe we had no epidural at that point and i was so tired i actually fell asleep in between contractions. machel was so kind to just stay with us at this point and we just waited for our little guy's head to turn. around midnight machel asked me to push during contractions (i didn't feel the "urge" to push but i was just happy this might lead to progress) i continued to push through contractions, she even asked if i had the urge to which i replied "sure" i get snarky when i am tired, hungry and not medicated :) remember the cranky nurse i mentioned earlier? well she was there...she was the "counter" while i pushed. i swear i would push for 4-5 seconds AND THEN she would start counting. very not cool. i made eye contact with ryan and he knew i was getting a little irritated so thankfully he started counting for me! we entered into active labor although i would still say i never felt the "urge" to push. machel had ryan and i play tug-a-war with a notted sheet to help me push harder however i was gripping the sheet so tight i couldn't straighten my fingers she decided we would just let me push like regular. ryan was being so sweet and texting our family the updates but i was so out of it i kept getting mad at him for texting. i was borderline delirious ...forgive me ry ok? he got the camera out and was taking pictures of "the moment" if you know what i mean, to which sweet machel told him "she would probably like you to take pictures from up by her head". bless her heart. machel kept saying "just an hour or so more..." 15 minutes later we had our beautiful, healthy baby boy in our arms. never underestimate a girl without an epidural. it was so amazing to hold my baby. i could not comprehend that he had been inside me for the last nine months! he is the most beautiful precious thing ever and most possibly the most loved little one! i love being wesson's mom.
shawni do not look at my hair. it was hideous. i needed you.
first time holding my little wesson. he is just the best!
they even let us bring him home with us. i think we were both a little shocked.
we love you wesson. you are the sweetest part of our family and we can't wait to watch you grow. Dad has your gun and fishing pole ready, you are the best little buddy he has been waiting for! and i love being the one you want when you are sad, or just want to cuddle, i really don't know what we did before you!
