first real "ouchie"...

mother of the freaking year here... 

my poor baby!

sometimes while i do dishes and such i would let wesson play in the pantry...

LESSON LEARNED

what does one bottle of ketchup + my sweet little babes chubby toe = too many tears to count...

...he cried for a good 3 minutes.

and then he was over it.

bless his heart!

so lucky he chose me...

august 31, 2007

...

add 4 years...

august 31, 2011

less photogenic.

more love.

ryan and i spent the evening doing a session at the Salt Lake temple.

and enjoyed dinner at The Garden (fried pickles...judge if you will but a-mazing!)

i love ryan. 

i love being his wife.

he is the most amazing husband a girl could ask for.

hardworking, smart, fun, ambitious, talented, hotttt, romantic, spontaneous...he LOVES to spoil me, he takes such good care of his family! 

can you believe it has been 4 years?!!

me neither...

i love you ry!

it's my blog and i'll cry if i want to...

i always wondered how personal was TOO personal in the old blog world...

maybe someone will read this and offer some fabulous insight that will relieve me from my troubles! (anyone....anyone...)

but anyway...

i have started to notice in the last year or so, so much tragedy. so much sadness. i think i used to just think old people were the only ones who died. sickness was something you could ALWAYS cure by going to the doctor. hospitals were for old people and women having healthy beautiful babies. divorce only happened to celebrities and lazy people who didn't want to work for it. 

i guess i woke up. 

hard things happen to really good people. 

sickness and death can come at anytime during life.

anger and hurt can come from the people we trust and love most.

i guess i want to go back to sleep. i am scared to live in a world where life IS fragile. i am not invincible. no one is. 

all we have is faith. which i guess i lack. because what i really want are answers. i want to know why our Father in Heaven needed a brand new mom with 4 month old baby? why did He need a new dad with a 10 day old baby and a loving 23 year old wife? why would He not give a baby girl a healthy heart? why would He let people fall in love when He knows one will hurt the other? why would He allow the same family to suffer hard trials back to back? why would He allow a little girls life to end way too early?

and i guess the weirdest question for me, why do I hurt so bad for people I barely know? why do I cry so hard for people I haven't met? 

last year in general conference someone said something about how women feel compassion and it is part of their divine nature...making us "divine"- making us God-like. I wish i could find that quote so I didn't feel like a crazy person!

truthfully i know my Father in Heaven loves me. He has blessed me and He has given my trials. through both my blessings and my trials I turn to Him. He has given me a husband who loves me (even when i am crazy) and a beautiful baby that He trusts me to teach and guide. he has given me friends who are supportive and closer than family. and a family who is constant and loving. my heart breaks for those who have trials without the knowledge of the gospel. because even with all the blessings i have the greatest knowledge i have is that i have a Savior who loves me. who died for me. and through Him i can be with my loved ones forever. this life is hard but eternity is worth it. 

so you be the judge- to heavy for blog-talk?  

Weber County Fair 2011

ryan and I love the fair!

it is our tradition. 

ryan grew up working at the fairgrounds.

cute huh?

we love it. we love the lemonade. and funnelcakes!

we love the trinkets.

the animals.

the demolition derby!

the weber county idol! (can i get an amen bryan saunders!)

well this year. the year we go to introduce our little one to everything fabulous that the fair is...

ryan worked. 

this was seriously crushing. 

enter: plan b! fair with my mother in law! we had so much fun! wesson LOVED IT! it was sad ryan wasn't there though. and he thoroughly loved looking at the pictures and hearing every "ooh" and "ahh" wesson made! 

some cute lady gave us tickets at the gate...Score! (those who know me well know i don't pay to go anywhere! so that was right up my alley!)

we loved it. wesson loved the animals. he danced a little bit to the weber county idol but it was too close to the rides so he got distracted. 

the lemonade line was long so we passed on it (unforgivable. i regretted it immediately!)

wesson loved these weird cows..."moose...moose" (everything is plural. do we'll keep working on moo!)

this picture captures his enthusiasm the whole night! i loved it!

forgive me...it had been a long hot day. but again...i love pictures of me with my boy!

wesson & grammie. she loves him soo much! 

i wonder how many other little ones clapped for the cows? probably not many! what a nice guy! 

me and my boy. he was about done at this point. but we had to see the pigs! 

but all in all we had a great time! here is to next year...

wesson's birthday

I love being a mom.

I love Wesson.

I love watching him grow and learn.

…..

but it makes me sad he will never be a “baby” again.

he is one.

he is walking.

he is all grown up! (not really but give my exaggeration a break!)

doesn’t it seem like it was just yesterday that little dream come true joined our little family?

well it wasn’t…

it was 365 (more now) days ago.

so how does one celebrate one?

crying!

just kidding. 

you throw a party to remember.

full of sweets, treats, pizza and drinks!

thank you to all our family and friends who joined us!

italian soda bar. really so fuN! 

out to dinner on wesson's actual birthday! my favorite people in the whole world. silly boy distracted by something else! 

i don't have a lot of pictures of just me and my boy! not a great one. but i love it!! that is my baby!!!

these two cuties share a birthday! how fun is that!? grandpa & wesson. 61 years apart!

at his part! it is a balloon cake! and he did pretty good i think!

just like we teach him...sharing! (shawni i Love this! i want to frame it!!...love that girl!)

because you want to know...

this boy makes me SO happy!

he is almost ONE.

he says:

what's that

dog

woof

hi

bye

love

momma

dadda

grannie

oh wow

uh oh

he took 3 steps..

stood up by himself twice

he just learned how to stick his tongue out at us!

he claps, waves and blows kisses...

i wouldn't trade a day with him for anything!

he makes me better.

i love him.

he loves us.

our life is pretty a.m.a.z.i.n.g.

did i mention i teared up when i realized he is almost a toddler...or is he already?!!

Father's Day 2011

wesson & i got up bright and early to make ryan breakfast in bed for his first official father's day! mostly wesson just ate all the waffles! (he had TWO whole waffles!) everytime i would tell him "shh we have to be quiet so dadda can sleep" he would laugh SO loud! sometimes he would just scream- oh dear.

when we took breakfast in to ryan, wesson just starts screaming to wake him up! it was hilarious! oh this kid loves his dad. you could tell he just knew it was dad's day! and we sure spoiled ryan good!

wesson sure spoiled ryan good! :)

the man at IFA told us not many dads are loved by a 10 month old like this.

ryan is the best dad ever.

he loves wesson and they have so much fun with each other.

that brad paisely song if he is anything like me, was written for my boys!

and it is so true- he'll be alright if he turns out like his dad!

wesson & i are both so lucky to have him!

(and i love this picture of wesson!)